I was in a meeting recently and we were discussing social-emotional learning. I currently work at a school that has been teaching into the IB Learner Profile. One of the teachers in my group said, “What about respect? These kids don’t know anything about respect. Forget about all this principled, caring, reflective stuff! Let’s just focus on respect!” Another teacher joined in, “Guys, think about what it would look like if we had a school just focused on respect! Wouldn’t that be amazing?”
Respect is such a nuanced word. It means different things to different people and in different situations. The fist teacher went on to talk about how we have kids screaming in the hallways and wandering around. Which actually felt like a jab at me because a student I have been working with just so happens to be one of the students “screaming in the halls.”
Yes, respect is good. I am definitely not going to lobby to throw it out the door. But the idea of throwing out the learner profile and focusing only on respect really sat wrong with me. It took me a little while to process and unpack, but I finally put my finger on why it bothered me so much. It struck me that the first teacher’s idea of respect was for students to comply with adult wishes. It had nothing to do with respecting individual needs of students. It had nothing to do with inclusion and belonging or even meeting students where they are.
It really sits wrong with me when someone’s idea of respect revolves around kids immediately and blindly complying with adult instructions. A child who has been taught to obey anything and everything an adult tells them to do never learns how to say no. What they do learn is to ignore their own instincts, to put others’ needs ahead of their own, and that their own wants and desires don’t matter. An abuser can spot these kids from a mile away. They grow up to be someone else’s punching bag, physically, verbally, and/or emotionally.
A compliance-based education does not teach students critical thinking. Critical thinking skills are vital for students to be able to objectively analyze, evaluate, and interpret information in order to make decisions and solve problems. As teachers, it should be our goal to teach our students critical thinking from as early as possible so that we can graduate innovative students ready to take on the world.
Oh, and the IB Learner Profile traits? Principled, open-minded, inquirer, balanced, caring, thinker, communicator, risk-taker, knowledgeable, and reflective. I’m pretty sure that if a student develops all of these traits, respect will be a natural by-product. Except this respect will evolve from a deep regard for others and will not rely on blind compliance. It will see beauty in diversity and seek to ensure that all people will not only be included, but also feel like they belong.